MASKING POOR COMMUNICATION 4
Accordingto Close Relationships Sometimes Mask Poor Communication,communication between people who are close such as spouses may be notbe as good as people assume. In fact, a study conducted on thesubject shows that spouses communicate with their loves in more orless the same way as strangers do. There is always a misconception ofsome level of understanding between people who know each other wellor at least are very close to each other. The article reveals twokinds of concepts that hinder communication in people who are closeto each other. The first concept is referred to as thecloseness-communication bias. This concept or rather misconception incommunication, was brought forward by Boaz Keysar, a Psychologyprofessor from the University of Chicago. A study was conducted toillustrate the misconception, in which 24 couples participated in theexperiment. The couples sat in two sets of chairs with their backsfacing each other and tried to make out phrases of words used bytheir spouse. For example, the use of its getting hot in here by afemale spouse to her husband suggested, some romantic advances ratherthan the need to turn up the air conditioner.
Thecloseness-communication bias thus illustrates how people close toeach other often miscommunicate because they know each other butstudies suggests that spouses communicate with each other just asstrangers do. The second concept in communication revealed by thestudy is the illusion of insight. This is a common misconception incommunication where people close to each other have an illusion ofunderstanding more than they actually do. As Savitsky puts it,couples may be on the same wavelength but maybe not be as much asthey reckon. This is because people close to each other often feelthey know the other person better that they stop looking at thingfrom the other person’s perspective(HealthDay,2011).
Miscommunicationin communication is a common phenomenon especially in regard to thesecond misconception. People close to each other often assume theyknow what the other person wants because they have spent so much timewith them and this sometimes acts as a barrier to communication. Ihave personally had my own share of misunderstanding in communicationbetween my sister and I. On one occasion my sister sent me to thegrocery shop to get her some goods but I instead brought hersomething different. I was forced to go back to the store and get herwhat she precisely wanted. The problem with such kind ofcommunication with close people is that people make assumptions whenasked to do something. In this case, my sister’s shopping habitsinfluenced the communication as I ended up getting her something sheoften gets from the store instead of what she wanted. Communicationshould always be a two way affair. There is always the sender and thereceiver. However in most communication one element is always elusiveand that is the feedback. A feedback is the only way the sender ofthe message can know or tell if the receiver understood themessage(Johnson).Therefore, as a receiver of a message it is often important to have afeedback in order to confirm the message. In order to avoid suchmiscommunication, it is always recommended to ask question when notsure about something. This can either be carried out through a phoneconversation while for example at the store before any goods arebought. Effective communication always requires feedback(Robinson, Segal, & Segal, 2015).
HealthDay.(2011). CloseRelationships Sometimes Mask Poor Communication.Retrieved April 6, 2015, from HealthDay:http://consumer.healthday.com/mental-health-information-25/behavior-health-news-56/close-relationships-sometimes-mask-poor-communication-649115.html
Johnson,K. S. (n.d.). Roleof Feedback in Communication.Retrieved April 5, 2015, from AZCentral:http://yourbusiness.azcentral.com/role-feedback-communication-7478.html
Robinson,L., Segal, J., & Segal, R. (2015, February). EffectiveCommunication.Retrieved April 5, 2015, from HelpGuide:http://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships/effective-communication.htm